“Yeah I guess” I replied and looked back at him. His eyes were looking directly at me. It’s as if he would see into my soul and made me look awa.... Ashamed he would be able to see the pain I was feeling in my heart. “Do you know what happened?” I asked him as I turned to look at the ocean again. Determined to bottle my emotions down.“Gas leak explosion from the engine room I think. Can’t be really sure. I was on the top level of the ship, changing the direction of the wind temperature meter. The. After a few days of searching, I started discussion with a man from UK who was traveling to my country.We arranged to meet at his rented apartment.I need to be honest that I was afraid again. It's been a while since I was not a daddy girl anymore so the feeling was like the first time.I even wanted to quit but I realized that I knocked at the door and the door opened.He invited me in. He was a pleasant man over 50 yo. He offered me a drink to relax. I get the first glass of wine and asked him. One wonders if they ever met at boarding school.I grew up with the ignominy of being a bastard, daughter of a bare-assed whore, so where the danger of low self esteem, first manifested itself, I grew a pair, and became a sexually charged aggressive. Then one day, the cock that helped produce me, just walked back into my life, a knock on the door, and there he stood.I must say I was immediately turned-on when I saw him, before finding out who he was in the grander scheme of things, but. We were finally together. He looked at me adoringly, then said my four favorite words.“I love you, Lexi.”The car behind me honked, snapping me out of my daydream. God damn it, it was just getting good. I grumbled and began driving. I’d been sat at the red light, letting my mind wander as the last rays of daylight faded over the horizon. Lost in fantasy, again. Frankly, I’d spent most of my life in fantasy. It was more fun. It was more exciting. And… it let you live out your What Ifs. Sometimes,.
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